An Apple [Pie] a Day

 
I’ve heard it said there’s nothing more American than baseball and apple pie.

Baseball I can do without.

Apple pie is another story.

 

Specifically, this story.

 

My pie starts with Grandmother’s pie.

For years, Grandma baked deserts for the lunch counter at the local sale barn.

Sadly, her legendary lemon meringue secret died with her.

When my mother married my father, she determined to make a better apple pie – specifically a better pie crust – than Grandma.

For years she labored, until one day Grandpa John said

I reckon this pie’s just as good as Gertie’s.

At least, he said something remarkably similar. This was before I was born.

 


 

Interestingly enough, when we moved Grandma out of that house sometime in the early 2000s, we found the secret to her pie crust:

packaged, premixed Flako Pie Crust

Flako Pie Crust Advert - Copy

Grandma was a cheater.

 


 

And so, for as long as I can remember, Mom made the best apple pie – no questions asked (or answered, for that matter).

I wish I could say I learned mad ninja pie skills at Mom’s knee, but the truth is I never really paid attention to what Mom did in the kitchen. What came out of the kitchen, everyone paid attention to.

Like countless generations before me, I didn’t miss Mom’s apple pie until I left home. One year I was given a very nice Pampered Chef stoneware pie plate, and I thought

I’m not going to let this go to waste. I’m going to learn to make an apple pie.

So I emailed Mom; several weeks later I received actual, hand-written recipe cards for our growing collection.

Even if I failed, I’d have these priceless family momentos.

Apple Pie Recipe Cards

I had several false starts.

Delicious false starts, but not quite what I wanted.

I set out to make Mom’s pie recipe my own.

I experimented with apple varieties.

I tweaked spice combinations.

I adjusted various and sundry quantities.

Finally, I baked a pie I was proud to call my own.

And when they next visited, Dad said

I think this pie is just as good as Mom’s.

And he’s not just saying that.

My pie is now in demand at nearly every holiday party.

My students frequently request a pie or two throughout the year.

If they pay for the ingredients, I’ll make them a few.

$20 will buy all the ingredients for two pies.

In fact, I’m baking pies today for a get-together tomorrow.

I started getting messages last Sunday that folks were anticipating my pie.

Now, I won’t tell you exactly what goes into my apple pie, but here’s some pictures to whet your appetite:

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

And don’t worry; I’m not the next Mrs. Lovett – or Mr. Lovett as the case may be.

 


 

Thanks to Vanessa of Petal & Mortar for contributing to the Prompt Box!

Apple Pie Prompt Card
 


 

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Monday Morning Grievances

It’s Monday and I haven’t had my coffee.

Garfield I Hate MondaysSpecifically, I dislike:

1. train crossings

2. censorship

Contrary to popular public opinion, you can think for yourself.

Don’t let the government or social media tell you what to think.

THINK FOR YOURSELF!

3. unremovable smartphone apps

Apple’s pre-installed apps takes up 50% of useable data.

4. “wrong” passwords

How can it be incorrect?

5. unhelpful help desks

If they won’t give help or information, why do they exist?

What are your grievances?


Have a suggestion for a poem, photograph, or future post?

Drop a note in the prompt box!

Don’t forget to follow me on:

Facebook – where I share news stories, articles from other blogs, and various and sundry miscellany that happens to catch my eye. It’s stuff you won’t see here! Well, mostly.

Instagram – where I show you my Life in Motion and share quotes and such. The widget only shows my last three photographs – don’t you want to see them all?

Twitter – where you can see my thoughts in 140 characters or less. Also, funny retweets.

Delayed by the Train

Stopped at Train TracksYesterday I mowed my lawn using a riding lawnmower I borrowed from my in-laws.

On a normal day, the ride back should take ten minutes or so.

Yesterday was not a normal day.

It began with the dinging of the gas light.

A Ford F150 Extended Cab hauling mowing paraphernalia might get 15 miles to the gallon.

Fine, I thought, I’ll just put a few gallons in on the way back.

No biggie.

At that exact moment, the car ahead of me slowed; the drawbridge was opening.

Great. Just what I need. Who knows how long this will take.

5 minutes?

10 minutes?

Once, I waited for 45 minutes.

Today, that would be a disaster.

Then I looked left.

Huh. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a train crossing those tracks before.

Any augur would run for the hills.

An augur I am not.

The drawbridge wasn’t open too long, and I drove on my merry way.

Then I realized: those little-used train tracks currently in use run right through town.

I’ll have to take the detour by the Library.

I forgot the train tracks run by the library.

I remembered too late to turn around.

A miracle! The car ahead of me left enough space for it to pull a u-turn; now I have enough space to correct my course.

I’ll just head through the historical district . . . where they just so happen to be doing utility work.

Still good, just do down one street and back up to the old Maola plant road . . . which is closed for road work.

Of course.

All this and I’m exactly one block closer to my destination – and once again blocked by the train.

Mercifully, it passes and I’m free once more, driving happily alongside the train.

Which must then turn in my direction.

Lowering the barrier and forcing me to wait yet again.

No way possible way around it unless I want to go nearly all the way back to my in-laws, take the bypass around town, and come in from the other direction.

In all, a good 15 mile trip. In a truck whose gas signal hasn’t stopped dinging at me.

Ain’t happening.

I sit the train out and make it home.

Ten minutes? Try Forty-five.

Oh, what happened with the gas?

Well, luckily I had filled a gas can, knowing what remained in the lawn mower would not suffice.

I poured half the gas in the truck and half the gas in the truck; it was enough to finish the job and get me to a gas station once I was done.

Hey, I can hear the train whistle from my house!

Stupid train.

 


 

Don’t forget to follow me on:

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The Great Donut Debate

Dunkin Donuts v Krispy KremeI’ve learned to like quite a few things since moving to the South:

Sweet Tea

Crabs (and most Seafood)

Cornbread

Pecan Pie

Grits

Pit Barbecue

Fried Green Tomatoes

Bojangles’ Chicken

However, one so-called “treat” remains  for which I have no taste:

Krispy Kreme Donuts


Advocates of the chain* claim things like

krispy kreme hot sign• Krispy Kreme taste more fresh and a lighter doughnut especially when hot

• Krispy Kreme . . . melt in your mouth

• Krispy Kreme for freshness

• KK donuts are light and airy

• I prefer the light fluffy doughnuts of KK

• Krispy Kreme is better when I consider it from the diabetic standpoint: the donuts are made with less dough and come in around 26 carbs apiece . . . I go for Krispy Kreme if I’m looking for something that won’t really spike my sugar.

* I gained these responses by asking an open question on my Facebook page.


I, however, dislike Krispy Kreme to the point that I will not give any of my hard-earned money to the franchise.

When someone visits from out-of-region, a trip to Krispy Kreme is inevitable.

On the occasions when I am forced to discuss Krispy Kreme, I loudly voice my negative opinion.

However, if someone were to spend their own cash and provide Krispy Kreme, I will – of course – parake.

No need to be rude, now is there?


By this point, you’ve probably deduced that I endorse the best [American] doughnut chain, Dunkin Donuts.

Obviously, Tim Hortons is the absolute best, but they’re decidedly rare in the U.S.

The evidence for Dunkin’s superiority is right there in the word donut – or, more accurately, doughnut.

Look again at the testimonials for Krispy Kreme and you see a running theme: light, airy, and fluffy.

No mention of cake or dough to be found.

Krispy Kreme “doughnuts” are little clouds of sugar and hot air bearing more resemblance to cotton candy than anything else.

Dunkin’ Donuts, on the other hand, is exactly, what a doughnut should be:

cakeydunkin donuts electric sign

a bit dense

filling

stick-to-your-ribs-and-mouth

decidedly not sickeningly sweet

Detractors of DD claim that their wares are

stale

dry

lack filling

Emphatically, they are wrong – especially about the filling.

Dunkin’ Donuts’ filled varieties exceed capacity; you’ll need a napkin or two per donut and still have enough filling to be satisfied.

For the record:

Boston Kreme is the best filled variety
Blueberry Cake is the best cake doughnut

I’m not alone in my assessment; other responders to my query stated

• Dunkin Donuts have substance [and] excellent cake . . . and creme filledI

• If I’m looking for a REAL donut, I’ll take Dunkin Donuts’ creme-filled types first and foremost


If these testimonials aren’t enough to sway you, consider Krispy Kreme’s sad attempt to buy your love.

Sure, they claim it’s in celebration of their birthday, but those of us who are enlightened in the ways of fried dough delicacies know the truth.

Look, I understand there’s no accounting for taste, but what can’t people just have the right taste?

If I haven’t scared you off, tell me your favorite chain / variety in the comments!

 


 

Don’t forget to follow me on:

Facebook – where I share news stories, articles from other blogs, and various and sundry miscellany that happens to catch my eye. It’s stuff you won’t see here! Well, mostly.

Instagram – where I show you my Life in Motion and share quotes and such. The widget only shows my last three photographs – don’t you want to see them all?

Twitter – where you can see my thoughts in 140 characters or less. Also, funny retweets.

Monday Morning Grievances

It’s Monday.

Garfield I Hate MondaysSpecifically, I dislike:

1. people who fail to use turn signals

2. expired coffee creamer

3. limp bacon

4. the “word” sammich

5. historical ignorance

 

What are your grievances?

 


 

Have a suggestion for a poem, photograph, or future post?

Drop a note in the prompt box!

 

Don’t forget to follow me on:

 
Facebook – where I share news stories, articles from other blogs, and various and sundry miscellany that happens to catch my eye. It’s stuff you won’t see here! Well, mostly.
 
Instagram – where I show you my Life in Motion and share quotes and such. The widget only shows my last three photographs – don’t you want to see them all?
 
Twitter – where you can see my thoughts in 140 characters or less. Also, funny retweets.

Sunday Snapshots

What did I do this week?

Well . . .

I finally finished my shrubbery; Kelly oversaw the final cleanup.

The foreman always has the cushy job!

Kelly on Brick Steps
A friend visited from Georgia; we went bowling!

Bowling with Nicknames
Obviously these are not our real names; can you guess who I was?

Oh, and here are the scores:

Bowling with Nicknames ScoresWe were supposed to visit the Outer Banks; unfortunately, he was called back to work and we didn’t go.

Sadness.

The trees fell.

More Sadness.

Goodbye TreesThe United States defeated Germany in the Women’s World Cup Semifinals.

Even More Sadness.

USA v Germany Women's World CupHowever, this week America celebrated its Independence Day!

Despite my post yesterday, I’m still proud to be an American.

I wore my traditional Old Navy Flag Tee:

Old Navy 15 Flag Tee

Enjoyed some Moxie:

Independence Day Moxie Moxie Tops

Chowed down on burgers, hotdogs, chips, pickles, potato salad, cupcakes, cookies, and strawberry shortcake!

IMG_3477IMG_3478IMG_3479

Sorry, I don’t do fireworks.

 

What did you do this week?

 


 

Have a suggestion for a poem, photograph, or future post?

Drop a note in the prompt box!

 

Don’t forget to follow me on:

 
Facebook – where I share news stories, articles from other blogs, and various and sundry miscellany that happens to catch my eye. It’s stuff you won’t see here! Well, mostly.
 
Instagram – where I show you my Life in Motion and share quotes and such. The widget only shows my last three photographs – don’t you want to see them all?
 
Twitter – where you can see my thoughts in 140 characters or less. Also, funny retweets.

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