The Quotable Pratchett: Maskerade

No one is actually dead until the ripples they cause in the world die away

With the passing of Sir Terry Pratchett and the publication of The Shepherd’s Crown, I embarked on an epic re-reading of all 41 official Discworld novels, with the goal of finishing by 31 December, 2016.

Famous for its wit and wisdom, the series offers countless quotable quotes on a variety of subjects. The quotes I share should not be considered the whole of Sir Terry’s excellent prose; indeed, they are the tasty appetizers to a succulent, nourishing meal.

About Maskerade

Makserade CoverThis is the 18th Discworld novel and the 5th Book of the Witches.

Things just haven’t been the same in the Ramtops kingdom of Lancre since Magrat Garlick became queen. As Nanny Ogg and Granny Weatherwax search for a new “maiden” for their coven, the most likely candidate, Anges Nitt, goes to Ankh-Morpork to make her own way.

Capable of singing in thirds with herself, Anges soon falls in with the Ankh-Morpork Opera. But, since this opera after all, things are never as they seem. Everyone has a secret, and, true to form, the Opera House is haunted by a mask-wearing ghost.

No matter the tragedy, the show must go on, even when Nanny and Granny show up to take on a publisher who’s short-changed Nanny for her best seller The Joye of Snacks.

Maskerade proves a fine satire on opera and musical theater.

The Goodreads Blurb:

The Ghost in the bone-white mask who haunts the Ankh-Morpork Opera House was always considered a benign presence — some would even say lucky — until he started killing people. The sudden rash of bizarre backstage deaths now threatens to mar the operatic debut of country girl Perdita X. (nee Agnes) Nitt, she of the ample body and ampler voice.

Perdita’s expected to hide in the chorus and sing arias out loud while a more petitely presentable soprano mouths the notes. But at least it’s an escape from scheming Nanny Ogg and old Granny Weatherwax back home, who want her to join their witchy ranks.

Once Granny sets her mind on something, however, it’s difficult — and often hazardous — to dissuade her. And no opera-prowling phantom fiend is going to keep a pair of determined hags down on the farm after they’ve seen Ankh-Morpork.

To the Quotes!

Discworld Librarian

 The  Librarian as he appears in The Discworld Companion, illustrated by Paul Kidby

He dreamed the dream of all those who publish books, which was to have so much gold in your pockets that you would have to employ two people just to hold your trousers up.

You needed three witches for a coven. Two witches was just an argument.

He didn’t like his back, either, especially when his back didn’t like him. It came to something when your vertebrae ganged up on you.

Hate is a fore of attraction. Hate is just love with its back turned.

This isn’t real life. This is opera. It doesn’t matter what the words mean. It’s the feeling that matters.

After you’d known Christine for any length of time, you found yourself fighting a desire to to look into her ear to see if you could spot daylight coming the other way.

Other people salted away money for their old age, but Nanny preferred to accumulate memories.

Nanny’s philosophy of life was to do what seemed like a good idea at the time, and to do it as hard as possible. It had never let her down.

The IQ of a mob is the IQ of its most stupid member divided by the number of mobsters.

. . .

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