Mushrooms, a Mushy Brain, and Music

I’ll be honest right up front: the last half of this last week has not been the best for me mentally. I’m okay, just understand that this post might not be as upbeat as normal. Then again, maybe it will be, and the writing of this post will be good for all of us. Anyway, I have pizza and chips and a ginger ale and Scooby Doo Meets Laurel and Hardy is playing on the TV so let’s sit down and chat a bit.

How have you liked my new daily post format? I’ve gotten a bit of engagement on those posts, and the little “posting streak” notifications are nice as well. Speaking of blogging notifications, it seems I’ve passed my eleven-year anniversary with WordPress, and it only took ten of those years to fill up the storage space with the basic plan. Suffice to say that in many regards I am not the same person that started this blog while also knowing that I am even more myself today than I was then.

Let’s see, this week. Well, Tuesday was Day of the Mushroom, and I decided to make myself a mushroom omelette, which turned out to be one of the most enjoyable things I’ve made in quite some time. At least to me; Krystal doesn’t like mushrooms and so I made roast Brussels sprouts for her (at her request, too).

The omelette in question was a 4-egg cast-iron omelette: baby bella, shiitake, and oyster mushrooms; onions, green peppers, and bacon; nature’s seasoning, salt, and cheddar/Gruyère cheeses. I had a mocha Frappuccino to wash it all down.

And here are Krystal’s sprouts:

Wednesday was Bat Appreciation Day, and while I think most of my followers adequately appreciate them, it was also the day my mental health began taking a downward turn. There’s no need to get into everything here, but suffice to say I felt the lowest I’ve felt since 2020 – barring an episode triggered by a certain scene in American Horror Story: Double Feature (Red Tide).

I’ve made no secret about my mental health struggles; if I were to place how I feel on a scale from 0 to 100, most days are spent between 85 and 95. Wednesday into Thursday I’d place between 10 and 20 depending on when you talked to me. I ended up taking a mental health day from work Thursday and spend it with a simmer pot going, alternating between listening to podcasts and cleaning in the apartment.

I also reached out online for encouragement over those few days, something I have done in the past but really, really needed it this week, and was grateful for the friends and family who reached out to chat and for everyone who sent pictures of cute animals and funny memes. I said it then and I will say it now again: I was not then and am not now in danger of doing anything one might later regret; my mental health was low and my anxiety high. Even today it’s not great but things have been steadily improving since Saturday morning.

Thursday was also Velociraptor Awareness Day, and I’m pleased we escaped their clutches for another year, though I’m told in some cases it was a close call:

Thursday night/Friday morning was also the release of Taylor Swift’s Tortured Poets Department, and you bet I woke up at midnight to listen to it. Then I went back to sleep and woke up on Friday to find more songs had dropped at 2:00 AM. I had so much fun talking about it with my friend Victoria that I forgot my coffee at home and had to pick one up at a cafe near work. I’m sure you are eagerly awaiting my thoughts on the album, adding my two cents to an already glutted market of takes both hot and cold, so here they are as reconstructed from texts, posts, and messages:

• “Daddy I Love Him” hit me with “these people only raise you to cage you” and then just before the bridge about how “I’d rather burn my whole life down and my good name is mine alone to disgrace” and I know a lot of her music is about her own relationships (which I cannot relate to) but damn if much of it also doesn’t apply to my complicated family/friend relationships – and she says it all set to some of the most indie folk music . . .
• Everyone complaining about bad lyrics and kinda same-sounding music missed the entire title of the album; we got exactly what was promised on the label. Will this be the most popular/greatest financial album? Probably not. But it may just be her best, and it’s definitely her most personal.
• It’s not pop and it’s certainly not country and the musical style isn’t punk or emo but there are soul crushing lyrics and I think this is the most Taylor album we’ve received; I’m calling it “Taylor Swift (Debut) 2.0”
• I’m awful at associating songs with people (I don’t care about her relationships) and so I missed some of the references to her current interest (Travis Kelsey)
• I’ve seen complaints about cringe lyrics in “So High School” but again, did you read the title of the song?
• Similarly, I’ve seen people say her line in “I Hate It Here” about taking part in an imaginary game and “wishing” she lived in the 1830s minus the racism is problematic. Apart from the fact she herself states in the next line this kills the mood at the party, there might also be some subtlety to this. I asked Krystal, who works at a historic site focusing on 1760-1835 (or so) what one would get if they took the 1830s and removed anything racist or racist-adjacent, and she said “puffy sleeves and boredom, and they aren’t even the good puffy sleeves, either.” And I think maybe that’s the point, that perhaps she picked the most boring decade imaginable because we’ve seen what it’s like when life gets interesting? Maybe she feels held captive by action that she longs to live in a time when nothing happens? Or maybe I’m just defending one of my favorite singers too much.
• It took me far too long to realize that “thanK you aIMee” was about Kim Kardashian because I thought the “I” was an “L” given the font and it was only when I heard the song that I put it together, realizing the person’s name was “Aimee” and not “Almee”.
• Victoria said the album is too big and she needs to edit a bit more. It’s inconsistent, though enjoyable on the whole. While I agree, I also think that in a way that matches the theme. In the grand scheme of things this probably won’t be as popular as most of her other albums but I think it’s definitely the most personal we’ve had in a while, if ever. And if she had to release it I think business-wise it makes sense now since she’s still doing Eras and doesn’t necessarily “need” a hit release.

So what songs did I like or favorite on Spotify? I’m glad you asked. After three full listen-throughs my current choices are:

• “The Tortured Poets Department”
• “But Daddy I Love Him”
• “Clara Bow”
• “The Black Dog”
• “imgonnagetyouback”
• “thanK you aIMee”

That’s not to say I think the other songs are bad; these are the ones I liked best on the album. Have you listened to the album, and if so, what do you think of it?

Friday night I was still feeling down but I tried to make a boxed jambalaya from Zatarain’s. It smelled great but my brain was telling me that food was gross and it took several hours of everyone telling me “eat something and you’ll feel a bit better” for me to finally cave in and reheat it and you know what? They were right. It didn’t fix things but I did feel a little better. I don’t know that I’d go around calling it jambalaya, though. It was just seasoned rice with some smoked sausage and a bit of onion and bell pepper. I have another box and next time I make it I’ll put in more onion and bell pepper and maybe a can of diced tomatoes. Krystal loved it and ate nearly all the leftovers, which rarely happens as she likes food diversity. If she’s eating the leftovers it’s a real hit.

Saturday I was supposed to go to a garden party, but it was cancelled due to severe weather. It was the exact right call but now I was kinda sad again. I usually go grocery shopping on Saturday, but the very thought of going grocery shopping is still giving me anxiety, which again is odd because normally I find that relaxing. Fortunately I still have stuff for the next couple days. I also didn’t have any more ingredients for a simmer pot, only down to a single lemon which I intend to use in a Bees Knees later on tonight (Sunday).

Krystal suggested I do something constructive but wasn’t sure what since crafts aren’t really my thing. But I found just the thing: a Christmas gift from my sister-in-law Sarah that I hadn’t used yet: a dinosaur Lego set. I took my time deliberately separating all the pieces and such to really draw out the time and over the course of an hour or so built this T-Rex:

That got me going just a bit and I got a shower and then made a batch of brownies, followed by lighting a candle and burning some cone incense while making a homemade pizza, because food just knows. The pizza crust gave me a little bit of pushback but I gently worked it into place and the result was a fantastic pizza with wonderfully soft yet structurally sound dough topped with cheese and pepperoni and bacon.

And now my pizza is gone and so is my ginger ale and now the TV is playing Scooby Doo Meets the Harlem Globetrotters and my right leg has fallen asleep because of the way I’m sitting so now it’s time for pins and needles.

How are you doing?

What have you been up to?