Monday Morning Grievance: Self-Checkout Lines

It’s Monday and I haven’t had my coffee.

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The other day I bought groceries and – as usual – used the self-checkout lane.

I like the self-checkout lane:

It’s quick.

It’s easy.

It means I don’t have to talk to a cashier.

There are those who don’t know how to use the checkout lane:

The gentleman whose entire order consists of one banana and can’t figure out how to ring it up.

Rather than ask for help, he mumbles curses at the machine and new-fangled technology in general.

The woman buying an entire grocery cart of produce without a clue of how to ring it in and – to top it off – can’t remember what type of produce she actually has in her cart.

She stands there comparing what she has in the bag to all the pictures.

It might not be so bad if she didn’t start over for each new item.

The couple buying several bottles of wine and cases of beer.

They have a clerk there to punch in the authorization code for each item.

You know what, it’d be faster to go through regular checkout, people.

There, they’d only have to punch it in once.

At least, that’s the way it normally works.

Heaven forbid your coupon doesn’t scan properly or a sale item doesn’t ring up right.

I know those 16 gig thumb drives are on sale for $3 a pop, but at a price that ridiculously low, did you really think there’d be no problems? Especially when you’re buying them from a grocery store?!

Sigh. Maybe I’d be better off using regular checkout myself.

But then I’d have to talk to the cashier.

I think I’ll stay right here, thank you very much.

Just do better next time, all right?



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10 thoughts on “Monday Morning Grievance: Self-Checkout Lines

  1. I hate that crap. Then the rare moment where you’ve done everything perfectly and the machine still prompts, “Please wait for an associate to assist you.’ With what? With WHAT?! And the associate says something to the effect of ‘Oh, we’re just supposed to ask if this is the item you really want, as there are almost two identical items available and only the one is on sale…’

    Pretty sure I consciously compared products before chucking the one in my cart, thanks. I didn’t want to talk to you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Some stores are worse than others. Lowe’s has a dreadful system – which they force everyone to use instead of having an actual check out lane open. There are 6 computerized check outs – multiple ones are broken and have been. Most of the time the others get stuck – or have that “let an associate assist…” message and single employee there is dashing from screen to screen trying to override/stick in some code and apologizing with “these things don’t work. I don’t know why they don’t fix them”…and it’s been like this for months and months…Arrrggg….avoiding that place – that should help the check out lines there..

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Don’t get why the US doesn’t have self-scanners which you use as you go round. We have the self-scan checkouts but they are such a pain if you have more than 3 items, but self-scanning as you go round is so easy and so fast as you pack as you go, and you’ll love it in one of the chains – Waitrose – as don’t have to speak to anyone when you pay either!


  4. Oh dear…I think I would be the gentleman (or old fedora-donning grannie in my case) fumbling about helplessly and muttering curses at technology in general. Blast. I don’t have to cope with this particular type of new-fangled technology, however. I am forced to endure the old fashioned route. And yes, being forced to yammer away with a cashier is a very disturbing, soul-rattling experience every time…not to mention, I also have to gab it up with the bagger…

    Splendid post. Enjoyed it immensely. All the best,

    Autumn Jade

    Liked by 1 person

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